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Throw another log on the Republicans' bonfire to roast democracy.
(Permanent Musical Accompaniment To This Post)
Being our semi-regular weekly survey of what’s going down in the several states where, as we know, the real work of governmentin’ gets done, and where businessmen drink my wine and plowmen dig my earth.
Regulars to this shebeen know the great affection in which the proprietor holds the great state of Wisconsin. It gives me great pain to bear witness to the fact that there are still so many noisy gossoons running amok across America’s Dairyland. For example, there’s this guy, Tim Michels, who’s running as the Republican candidate for governor.
Michels, the candidate in question, quickly thumbed through his dogeared copy of the MAGA Guide To Rapid Response and quickly arrived at a particularly well-thumbed page headed, “Blame The Media, Dummy,” and began blasting out some tweets:
"These unproven allegations do not reflect the training and culture at Michels Corporation. Harassment in the workplace should not be condoned, nor tolerated, nor was it under Michels Corporation leadership.
The statement went on, "This is a coordinated attack by Evers and his allies in the media. Shame on Governor Evers and others who are trying to destroy the reputation of a great Wisconsin company for political purposes." (And it went on and on from there.)
Earlier in the campaign, when the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel revealed that Michels and his wife had donated to a number of hardcore anti-gay and anti-choice organizations—among the latter were groups that used cellphone tracking software to “discourage” people considering abortion—Michels went off on the media then, too, but with a bear-spray twist on his remarks.
Which brings us to the latest outburst from Michael Gableman, a former justice on the state Supreme Court and the guy who was fired from his sweet gig as the majordomo of the state’s farcical million-dollar re-examination of the 2020 election results. Gableman’s “investigation” was such a clown show that Robin Vos, the Republican speaker of the Wisconsin House—no bargain his own self—fired Gableman (after he endorsed Vos' primary opponent, no less).
Gableman was invited to speak at the Outagamie County GOP’s annual Constitution Day dinner. This will become unbearably ironic in a few moments. Gableman got up at the Constitution Day dinner and celebrated the Constitution by suggesting its violent overthrow. Or something.
Gableman doesn’t impress me as much of a Joseph Warren, or even a Daniel Shays. But this kind of talk gets around, and between Michels’ pitchforks and Gableman’s Jeffersonian bloodletting, there’s a lot of room for people who behave like actual soldiers.
We move on over to Michigan, where the Republican candidate for attorney general, Matthew DePerno, is tangled up in charges that he was at the very least present when some Trumpian ratfckers allegedly ran loose among the vote-tabulating machines in several townships during the prolonged hash the Trump people made of the months after the election. Michigan AG appointed a special prosecutor to look into the matter. From BridgeMichigan:
DePerno has responded by calling the investigation a “political prosecution,” which shows that Michels isn’t the only one with a dogeared copy of that MAGA Guide. But there’s no doubting his bona fides as an election truther.
No matter what happens to El Caudillo del Mar-A-Lago, what he’s loosed into the country’s political bloodstream isn’t easily washed out. It’s going to be with us for a while.
We stop now in Ohio, where incumbent Democratic Rep. Marcy Kaptur is facing a tough re-election fight against a rising MAGA star named named J.R. Majewski, who had a star turn at the former president*’s bizarre rally in Youngstown. Majewski has campaigned as an Afghanistan combat veteran, and he certainly looked the part, with all kinds of dick-waving swagger. Except, well, no. From the AP:
Is there more of this? Of course there is.
Where do they find these people, and how much do I have to pay someone never to go there?
Let’s stop off in Jackson, shall we, and see how folks are doing with boiling their brown water these days. Oh, here’s Mississippi’s governor, Tate Reeves, making a funny. We all need to laugh in these troubled times. From YahooNews:
You know what, Governor Tate? Maybe you should leave your governor hat there in Hattiesburg, get in that car of yours and don't stop driving until you see the "Welcome to Mississippi" signs in your rearview.
And we conclude, as is our custom, in the great state of Oklahoma, whence Blog Official Goat Roping Instructor Friedman of the Plains brings us the tale of how that state’s supreme court parked that state’s governor deep into the cheap seats. The issue was Gov. Kevin Stitt’s unilateral seizure of control over COVID protocols in the Oklahoma public schools. From KFOR:
What you just heard was the sound of a gavel falling onto the rocky promontory of Governor Stitt’s skull.
This is your democracy, America. Cherish it.
Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976. He lives near Boston and has his three children.
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